Having Kids

Before I had kids, I was apprehensive about the idea of parenthood. I perceived it as an end to fun and coolness, and children seemed like little terrors to my childless self. However, having children of my own has completely transformed my perspective. The instant emotional bond and protective instincts that kicked in were overwhelming and unexpected.

My previous observations of parents and children were skewed by selection bias. I only noticed the noisy, troublesome interactions, often in places like airplanes, which are hardly ideal for children. I missed the quiet, beautiful moments that parents frequently experience. These moments of peace and contentment with my children are now numerous and invaluable.

I also realized that my view of parenthood, shaped by my own mischievous childhood, was incomplete. I didn't appreciate the joy and friendship that children bring. They are not only lovable but also genuinely interesting companions. Playing with them and engaging in their world can be surprisingly enjoyable.

Having kids does impact productivity and ambition. Your time becomes structured around their schedules, and your attention is often focused on them. Yet, this doesn't mean that ambition is extinguished. It's about finding new ways to integrate work and family life. For me, using my children as motivation has been effective.

I remember my life before kids and the freedom I had, but I realize now that I rarely utilized that freedom. The happiness I've found in parenthood surpasses any potential happiness I had before. While everyone's experience is different, the common thread seems to be the profound joy that children bring.

The original article: https://paulgraham.com/kids.html